It is always good to gain a different perspective on an issue, even if it is different from one’s own view, as this challenges our beliefs and makes us examine our thoughts in a different light.
When I was discussing the issue of regulars with a lady I have known for over two years, she asked whether, as a Punter, I ever get “bored” with seeing someone and if I do not personally get a greater thrill from seeing someone new?
Great question and one I needed to think about in some detail. In short, I guess, in short, it comes down to the connection and chemistry one enjoys with someone. If the connection is good, if there is a spark which causes the pulse to rise each time we meet, if we click on several levels, then no, I do not become “bored”.
Sometimes things do not endure, such as if it just feels mechanical, one is going through the motions and there is no buzz any more, then things can seem laboured and one needs to be honest about whether this is the type of encounter one seeks.
Contempt or respect?
We all know the saying of “familiarity breeds contempt”, but does it? Does familiarity not also breed respect? The better one knows someone, is it not the case this enhances our appreciation and trust in the other party?
Naturally we know there faults, idiosyncrasies and foibles and in the context of a Punter/Escort relationship when we are laid bare before each other, we know often know more about each other than even close friends and family do. But why should this cause contempt? Is it not better to embrace each party’s individuality?
Participating in the Escort scene, of course there is a thrill of meeting a stranger for sex. I am sure this appeals to many who are involved in it, be they a Punter or an Escort. However, this does not mean meeting a regular cannot provide as good, if not a greater thrill.
When two parties understand each other well, when there is a subliminal awareness of each other’s preferences and desires and a mutual respect and trust, can this be topped by a new encounter? Personally, I think not.
There is a much more wholesome and rounded aspect to seeing someone I know well, where we can chat freely, without inhibition or fear of being judged, where we understand each other and relate to one and another and where we can be “ourself”. Then, what follows also tends to be much more explosive.
This is not to say there cannot be insanely fulfilling first encounters, as I have experienced a few such meetings. However, the percentage of such meetings are fewer than there are with regulars. My opinion based on my experiences alone.
In some scenarios, familiarity can breed contempt, but this is more down to the parties involved per say, rather than as an irrefutable law of all regular meetings. For me, if someone is worth seeing regularly and here I mean a couple of times a month over a long period, this is due to a mutual connection and appreciation and contempt does not even come in to it at all.
This post is dedicated to my good friend whom I am more than happy to share familiarity with, which has engendered huge respect for her.