Have you ever aborted going through with a meeting, either in the lead up to it or at the very last minute?
What caused this? Was it a gut feeling telling you something was not right or was it a “bottle job”?
I hasten to add, if it were the latter, do not feel embarrassed or ashamed, as I would hazard a guess that many of us Gentlemen Punters feel like this at some point or other. The difference being feeling like aborting and actually doing so.
I imagine for the ladies concerned it is an annoying occurrence, but I would encourage everyone to distinguish the difference between those who cannot go through with a booking due to nerves or guilt or a myriad of other reasons, from those who are just blatant timewasters and I would implore ladies not to label every gent as such.
I am sure there are plenty of ladies who do understand and display a high degree of empathy, despite the loss of a booking and the nuisance and lost revenue this causes, whilst there are those ladies who will be merciless in their scorn.
Although I have never aborted, I have had occasions when I have had to fight the nerves and the inner voice, so I can understand if this becomes all-consuming for some gents, causing a paralysis which is difficult to get beyond.
I am certain many ladies have encountered this, judging from the comments I have heard. From the Punters who turn up at the door physically shaking and need to be coaxed over the threshold and then calmed down, to those who turn up and then need to “pop out to collect something” only never to return, to those who just do not ever turn up, it seems to me most ladies have some experience of this.
This does then pose two questions: (1) How can the nervous Punter overcome this anxiety? and (2) What can ladies do to put the anxious at ease?
The nervous Punter
The first thing to acknowledge is there is nothing wrong in feeling like this, as many of us do so at some stage or other.
If one does feel like this, ask what it is causing this anxiety? The fear of the unknown? A particular unease over seeing a certain person or situation? A feeling of inferiority? Guilt? Body image issues? A distinct lack of self-confidence?
Such anxieties can surface at any stage. The most important thing is to acknowledge them and then to rationalise them. Is it a real fear or totally irrational?
Is you inner voice trying to forewarn you and should it then be heeded?
Ask yourself, if you do not go through with the booking, how will you feel? Regret or relief? If it is relief, then this probably is not the scene for you, or you are not ready for it yet. If it would be regret, go for it! (Read my post “Feel the fear” http://wp.me/p1rllI-cJ)
If it is a feeling of inferiority, what makes you feel this way? Is it justified? Let’s be honest, most of us see ourselves in a more negative light over some aspects of ourselves than those around us. I am sure you will find any professional lady more than accommodating and very adept at putting you at your ease. Moreover, any accomplished lady will have experience of seeing all sorts of guys and generally look for the good in their clients. Many of those she will have already seen will also have been nervous – you are not alone!
When it comes to guilt, only you can decide whether this is justified or not. Whether you feel it is right to go through with it or not is up to you. However, if you are concerned about the ethics or moral arguments about seeing an Escort, would you rather believe society’s views or to find out for yourself and to base you opinions on fact not stereotypes? It is your choice.
The Escort’s role
I must state here though, I am not, nor would NEVER seek to tell someone else how to do their job. That would be crass in the extreme! All I aim to do is to give a Punter’s perspective, in the hope it may help.
However, before any lady can help a Punter handle his nerves, gents have to help the lady first. Most ladies I have met have been incredibly talented and gifted in many respects. However, I doubt many are mind readers!
If one is feeling nervous, tell the lady! It all comes down to good communication. Email, call, text or say when you arrive. I would guess most basic fears are not unique to you alone and can soon be allayed.
Once us gents have been honest, I would imagine most decent ladies will be more than able to accommodate a guy’s concerns and deal with him with empathy and consideration.
I know many guys wonder how they will be received. Therefore, warm and open communication beforehand or a cordial greeting can put even the most timid potential client at ease.
To my mind, fear is such a disabling adversary yet it can be conquered on so many ways. Least of all, do not feel you need to suffer alone. Go onto one of the various forums and chat with other Punters or Escorts. Here are but a few:
The Oldest Profession http://oldestprof.com
Facing up to a fear soon renders it obsolete, so try to be clear what it is you are frightened of.
Then, chatting with a lady you wish to see about your concerns will help: a problem shared and all that.
Finally, even if you have had an occasion (or occasions) in the past when you have “bottled it”, this does not matter in the present and the future. The only time this matters is if you let it become your reality and define your punting experience.
It does not matter how many times you have “fallen” before. All that matters is to pick yourself up and to go again. Then the only bottle which will matter will be the one you open to toast your success and to celebrate a fear vanquished.